I Love My Wife Section Three

Section Three

The next month or so, I had lived like an aristocrat.  I always accompanied Xu Yong like lovers, appeared in varieties of high-level social salons.  Everything was so real, but I still was like dreaming.

Ding Yu didn’t ask much about why I did not go home that night. When I went to work, my colleagues told me that Ding Yu even called them.  I knew that Yu Ding must have learned my lying to him, but why did not he expose it?  The relationship between me and Xu Yong was very secretive, and it was also difficult for Ding Yu to have those high-level social activities.

Ding Yu had changed and just kept writing back at home and never spoke if I didn’t ask him.  His unclear attitude bored me, strangely, we started the Cold War.

Ding Yu started cooking his own meals, while Xu Yong and I had dinners in different Korean and French restaurants.  Only once when I got back home and saw the messy kitchen and several sausages on the table, my heart suddenly came up a trace of guilt.

One day, Xu Yong and I were strolling in a mall.  There was a lot of fancy clothing as if specifically designed for people like Xu Yong.  I knew I was not such people, but the original vanity was satisfied.

When I was casually looking through the expensive clothes on both sides of the racks, Xu Yong’s footsteps suddenly stopped.  Curiously, I looked at him; he did not look at me but said: “That man has been watching you.”

I looked towards his view.  My body suddenly froze, and was nailed there.

Ding Yu.

I was flurried.  He never came to this kind of places where he could not afford, and I had never had the dream of his showing up in front of us.

Ding Yu looked very complex, as if a lot of things hinged together.  His eyes made my heart pain.  I put aside Xu Yong and headed for Ding Yu: “Ding Yu, you listen to me … …”

Ding Yu turned and ran away.

I was frozen there, biting the lower lip, watching the direction where he disappeared without a move.

Xu Yong came over, held me and chuckled: “Well, stop watching, I send you home!”  I leered at him and hated him for the chuckling.  At that moment, I had a hint of fatigue and regret.  I did not answer and just let him send me home.

At home, Ding Yu was smoking cigarettes one after another.  In the light, the room was filled with the choking smoke.  Only in this short time, Ding Yu seemed aged.

I looked at the familiar face which I had loved for five years and my eyes moisten.

Ding Yu puffed the cigarette deeply and then snuffed it: “Ran, since you are back, better go to bed early.”

His calm tone was greatly beyond my expectation.  I was filled with anxiety, asked: “Don’t you … … have anything to ask me?”

He shook his head, made himself smile with frustration and sadness: “Not necessary.  There are some things I do not know better than to know.”  I bited the lip, softly said: “Yu, I … …”

Ding Yu waved his hands and interrupted my words, “Ran, never mind.  I really do not want to hear.  You and him, I knew already.”  I suddenly looked at him but saw the bitterness at the corners of his mouth: “Remember, a lot of my classmates are living better than me.  I had never believed what they said, but today I witnessed.  I have not seen your happy looking for a long time like today when you are with him.”

Ding Yu lit another cigarette, took a deep puff, had some choked voice: “Ran, I am guilty.”

I cried.  It wasn’t that he had no thoughts.  I said: “Yu, let us re-start it, okay?”

Ding Yu just puffed the cigarette and looked at me coldly.  That pale face made me dare not watch intently.

His silence gave me a clear answer.